The other day, my wife and I got into some petty argument. (I say it was petty. She would have said it was Armageddon.).
As it was, neither of us would admit the possibility that we might be in error.
My wife finally said, “Look. I’ll tell you what. I’ll admit I’m wrong if you admit I was right.”
“Fine.” I said.
She took a deep breath, looked me in the eye and said, “I’m wrong.”
I grinned and replied, “You’re right.”
(oldie but goodie)
I was out attempting to launch a kite.
I threw the kite up in the air, the wind would catch it for a few
seconds, then it would come crashing back down to earth.
I tried this a few more times with no success.
All the while, my wife was watching.
Muttering to herself how men need to be told how to do everything.
Finally she yells to me
"You need more tail."
I turned with a confused look on my face and yelled back,
“Make up your mind. Last night, you told me to go fly a kite.”
Marriage is like a late-night phone call.
You get a ring and then you wake up.
An elderly man was stopped by the police around 2 AM and was asked where he was going at that time of night.
The man replied, “I’m on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late.”
The officer then asked, “Really? Who’s giving that lecture at this time of night?”
The man replied, “That would be my wife.”
Husband: “Honey, I don’t like you with the new glasses on.”
Wife: “But sweetheart, I don’t wear any glasses.”
Husband: "True, but I do.”
Ent er the tree humor.
Yew just told an over-elmingly acorny j-oak!
Tree jokes always ring true for me.
Sorry I had to leaf for a while. Had to go needle some Trumplings.
My husband needs one of these