Tasteless but still funny

Pulling it from the feet.

Won’t work for too long though. They’re gonna need button ups.

How did that mofo stay awake for neurosurgery?

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How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two.

One to change the bulb, and one to hold the penis.

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When I was a kid, I made a sandcastle with my grandma.

Unfortunately, it didn’t impress anyone at the cremation.

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This is exactly the kind of repression of childhood creativity I am talking about!

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Shaving with a straight razor takes a lot of courage…

I used to shave my privates with one, but I don’t have the balls to do that now

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Some last names originate from what the family did in the past…

Makes you wonder about the Dickinsons?

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What do you call someone who masturbates to the Iliad and the Odyssey?

A Homer-Sexual

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D’oh!

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Bewbs are like the sun

With sunglasses you can look longer

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But curiously during an eclipse, you don’t need sunglasses.

Eclipses last mere minutes: you trying to confess something?

What ever do you mean?

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After having anal sex with my girlfriend she had a prolapse.

She was really bummed out.