Todays Funny


#61

An actual Trump sentence…
Look, having nuclear—my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at MIT; good genes, very good genes,
OK, very smart, the Wharton School of Finance, very good, very smart
—you know, if you’re a conservative Republican, if I were a liberal, if,
like, OK, if I ran as a liberal Democrat, they would say I’m one of the
smartest people anywhere in the world—it’s true!—but when you’re a
conservative Republican they try—oh, do they do a number—that’s
why I always start off: Went to Wharton, was a good student, went
there, went there, did this, built a fortune—you know I have to give my
like credentials all the time, because we’re a little disadvantaged—but
you look at the nuclear deal, the thing that really bothers me—it would
have been so easy, and it’s not as important as these lives are (nuclear
is powerful; my uncle explained that to me many, many years ago, the
power and that was 35 years ago; he would explain the power of
what’s going to happen and he was right—who would have thought?),
but when you look at what’s going on with the four prisoners—now it
used to be three, now it’s four—but when it was three and even now, I
would have said it’s all in the messenger; fellas, and it is fellas because,
you know, they don’t, they haven’t figured that the women are smarter
right now than the men, so, you know, it’s gonna take them about
another 150 years—but the Persians are great negotiators, the Iranians are great negotiators, so, and they, they just killed, they just killed us.


#62

Jeebus, get that guy a teleprompter.


#63

So, is he telling us he’s going to push the button first chance he gets? I guess I do have reading comprehension issues, because I am just not clear on that, like what he was saying, because it’s very, well, you know, I have a second cousin who talks like that and, look, I’m very, very smart, but you have to stop sometimes and just say, Look, I know you went to CUNY and everything, and were just 3 credits shy of your BA degree, but maybe you’re not as smart as you think you are. But he says that evolution is just a theory, and maybe he’s right, because he seems dumber than any ape I ever encountered. Anywho, he is a big proponent of nuclear energy. And of privatizing water. What a sick fuck. And, he voted for Trump. So maybe he understands what Trump is really saying with all that high falutin language he uses.


#64

This isn’t funny! It’s true and very sad :((


#65

https://scontent-sea1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/15697338_10206755906530686_8686414092852366790_n.jpg?oh=88e6edf093aa7771a4e89f43bb5f99e8&oe=58DDA8EF


#66

Driver could not figure out why the police pulled him over.

https://scontent-sea1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/s480x480/15873141_10154818725467808_6491700679977047932_n.jpg?oh=7850b4e219106aeb99540f53e8862703&oe=58E67070


#67

I bet you can guess what that Russian writin translates to.


#68

(It is said that Disneyland is a People Trap built by a mouse…)


#69

#70

Q: What do I have in common with Mariah Carey?

A: I don’t know the words to her songs either.


#71

https://scontent-sea1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p320x320/15940564_379253465761585_4398953685220067414_n.jpg?oh=e8aadbd5391fc35e7944a22fb331f73e&oe=58D6E883


#72

LMAO. Eric also sounds like he has a very high IQ.


#73

I think Trumpco will be just fine with young Eric at the helm.


#74

What happens when you add “ing” to famous movie titles? This:

More: http://m.imgur.com/a/40J9k


#75

https://scontent-sea1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/l/t1.0-9/15941341_1360272514024429_6045177800808910806_n.jpg?oh=c74c129124ba927f448891578a5234a3&oe=591B2EA0


#76

https://scontent-sea1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/12631294_214447662233161_5160036008086580522_n.jpg?oh=55df68ad6b14c47c20b9a34a4bf922f0&oe=58DAF7BD


#77

FUPA and Mum Bum Jeans FTW!


#78

Please do not post things like that anymore. ^^^^^^^^^


#79

HAHAHAHA!

I’m making no promises.


#80

https://scontent-sea1-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p480x480/12006218_10204931329467513_2490309359484009964_n.jpg?oh=a3b003d9ef428f599ca05a297d15d95e&oe=59036C06