Yes, the nice FEMA inspector is here to help you

A senior citizen survived Irma — but not a visit by a teenage FEMA contractor, cops say

http://www.miamiherald.com/news/state/florida/article194641719.html

“Currently, FEMA contracts with two private sector companies for disaster survivor home inspections,” FEMA said in a statement. “Questions about individuals employed within those contracted companies, or those companies’ hiring practices, must be pursued through their individual contractors.”

Gotta love it.

“We invoke the authority of the federal government to place this individual in your house, but WE ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE for what he does there.”

I beg to differ, motherfuckers.

The woman told the station that Jackson asked about things like the local crime rate and number of guns she had in her house.

That right there would have put him in one of my waiting holes

How many folks do you have in there already?